A Trick for Anxious Thoughts
Here’s a quick trick for dealing with anxious thoughts that you wish would just go away (e.g., intrusive thoughts of worries, memories, fears, worst-case scenario hypotheses, etc.). Often times, when we struggle against our thoughts, try to distract ourselves from them, or criticize ourselves for having them, they only dig in further, or resurface bigger and badder the next time they arise. As with quicksand, the more we struggle, the deeper we sink.
So what’s the other option? Just accept the thoughts as they are? I do believe this is ultimately effective, but is much easier said than done. This is like the Zen phrase, “The great way is not complicated, just don’t have preferences.” Okay, but how could I possibly not have preferences in reality? I am human and I do have preferences.
Here’s a strategy that takes a slightly different approach, one of direct engagement with the thought, then a transformation of it into its most basic subcomponents, and finally at that stage an offering of nonjudgmental acceptance to the subcomponents. Said more simply: first transform the story into sensation (the basic particles of the thought), and then offer that sensation nonjudgment.
STORY - SENSATION - NONJUDGMENT (REPEAT)
STORY - SENSATION - NONJUDGMENT (REPEAT)
This can be done in any moment, as there is likely some story occurring almost always. The story is based on one’s persona, their collection of experiences, their hi-story, the story of who they are, how others see them, and how they see themselves. And at any point, this story can be dropped in favor simply of what you feel. When you look for the story, for any tangible evidence of its existence, what do you find? In my experience, there is no evidence to be found, there really is only just This, just This Feeling. And then I have the option to add story on top of the feeling, or just feel “It.”
For example, I just felt an itch on my face. The itch can quickly connect to stories about a dry face, memories of having acne, annoyance at the itch potentially activating other annoyances in my life, etc. I have the chance, in an instant, to notice this flurry of story generation, simply notice it, then return to just sensation, the sensation of an itch occurring in the upper corner of my right eye. And even that includes a more subtle element of story in that I’m describing the feeling with language. The feeling exists prior to the clothing of language and can exist au naturel. What is feeling like in its unclothed natural state? The feeling is no longer an “itch.” It is Just This. It is not the story I add to it from my closet of stories.
And there is nothing wrong with Just This. It is just what is.
The itch is a benign example arising from my own Right Now experience, but this could be applied to any situation, and particularly to strong emotions such as “anger,” “anxiety,” “sadness,” “confusion,” “jealousy,” etc. In their pure form, these emotions exist as sensations, and can be felt in their natural state, neither good nor bad. Here’s another line from the Zen world: “Zen is what lies beyond ideas of good and bad.”
In order to really notice the impact on your life, I recommend practicing this technique (story into sensation into nonjudgment) both in times of stress and relaxation, any time you can remember to try it. It could be while taking a walk, noticing the thought, “This is pleasant,” and dropping into just the sensation beneath the story, or maybe while in a heated argument, noticing the thought, “What is wrong with you?!,” and dropping into just the sensation beneath the story. The sensations in both these examples can equally be experienced with nonjudgment and may even be seen as expressions of the same basic stuff, the stuff that purely exists before I add the clothing of story.
In any moment,
you can practice this:
Notice the STORY,
Distill it into just
SENSATION,
&
offer NONJUDGMENT
to the pure sensation.
…
*STORY*
*SENSATION*
*NONJUDGMENT*
(repeat)
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