Charles Freligh | Second Arrow Well-Being

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Anxiety Reframe

“Think of the brain as a hill covered in snow, and thoughts as sleds gliding down that hill. As one sled after another goes down the hill, a small number of main trails will appear in the snow. And every time a new sled goes down, it will be drawn into preexisting trails, almost like a magnet. In time it becomes more and more difficult to glide down the hill on any other path or in a different direction.”
- Mendel Kaelen


I recently released a new 5-day course on the Insight Timer app called Stop Anxiety through Psychological Openness, which is based upon the central metaphor of allowing “new snow” to fall over the preexisting trails referred to in the quote above. Those trails are built up over the course of a lifetime and can become very sticky means of moving away from discomfort. There isn’t necessarily any problem with using these familiar means of reducing discomfort, but if those means are negatively impacting your life (e.g., through addiction, persistent avoidance/isolation, reactivity, etc.), then it may be worthwhile to explore the possibility of allowing new snow to fill up these habitual trails.

In the title of the course, I refer to “anxiety,” but this is just one example of an uncomfortable feeling that might live at the top of the hill. It could be anything, any feeling that you don’t like and want to get rid of. The difficult thing about allowing new snow to fall is that it entails doing the exact opposite of what you want to do, it entails genuinely inviting the discomfort to stay. But if you can develop the ability to genuinely be-with the discomfort without doing anything about it, then “it” inevitably will change. The familiar uncomfortable feeling can become something new if we will allow it to be something new, if we give it permission to change by, for example, not automatically identifying it as “bad.”

New snow is waiting to fall if you can just stop doing anything, and wait. There is a vulnerability in this waiting, a cringing, skin-crawling uncertainty of not knowing what will come, and this uncertainty is a concomitant byproduct of growth. My hope, in creating this course, is to help you stay with this uncertainty and, acknowledging how scary it can be, to also see how beautiful it can be, standing at the top of the hill. Here’s the link again if you’re interested in joining me…

New snow will fall

if you just keep staying

at the top of the hill.


***On a final note, I’ve added an option at the end of these blog posts for you to make a small contribution if you’d like. Please only do so if you feel moved to, and know that your donation goes directly toward helping me continue to provide affordable individual guidance as well as create new content, such as this blog, in the name of increased well-being and reduced psychological suffering. One particular project I’m currently working on is a book that encapsulates my psychological, philosophical, and spiritual perspective on getting to know oneself deeply and getting out of one’s own way. If you’re so inclined, your contribution would support these efforts and would be greatly appreciated (click the button below to donate). Thank you for being here!

See this donate button in the original post